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[ Alina gets an image, which appears to have been doodled on lined notebook paper: ]
Good times ...
How was the rest of your scavenger hunt? Did you make it down to the club in the basement?
Good times ...
How was the rest of your scavenger hunt? Did you make it down to the club in the basement?
You look dashingly swoony.
( it's cute, really. consider it worthy of being pinned on a fridge, if she owned one. )
I had a friend who helped with the rest of my hunt.
It was a bit like having an overactive bloodhound on my side.
I did. Did you ( have fun? how does she even broach this without a certain degree of awkwardness. ) What did you make of it?
( it's cute, really. consider it worthy of being pinned on a fridge, if she owned one. )
I had a friend who helped with the rest of my hunt.
It was a bit like having an overactive bloodhound on my side.
I did. Did you ( have fun? how does she even broach this without a certain degree of awkwardness. ) What did you make of it?
( she's awake, in the way that she's always awake between these hours — blearily, existing somewhere in the liminal space between remembered nightmares and her own waking thoughts. which is to say: it's an embarrassingly brief wait, between paul's message and the blip of her own. )
it sounds like it was either a very good one or a very bad one, if it was memorable enough to share.
( two guesses on which outcome she's most worried about. )
it sounds like it was either a very good one or a very bad one, if it was memorable enough to share.
( two guesses on which outcome she's most worried about. )
( an image sent — it's some statue that seems more suitable for a museum, featuring a seated woman with a secondary woman knelt before her, kissing her knees. )
Isn't it striking how art reflects life?
Isn't it striking how art reflects life?
( it's irritating, how instantly she heats, skin mortified into bloodstain-red. parisa's natural talents alina has thus witnessed: needling under skin like a devoted splinter, and her worrying success in bleeding out alina's worst impulses. )
they've captured your smug air and small chest remarkably well, in that case.
( offense as a defense it is, then. more importantly, where is the block function on these stupid things. )
they've captured your smug air and small chest remarkably well, in that case.
( offense as a defense it is, then. more importantly, where is the block function on these stupid things. )
[ Erik isn't normally the kind of person to care how others are doing, but given that she appears to have some kind of 'mutation' - fuck the word Grisha - he finds himself a touch more invested. ]
I hope you've managed to avoid the dangers so far.
[ Translation: you good, girl? ]
I hope you've managed to avoid the dangers so far.
[ Translation: you good, girl? ]
Dangers such as mysterious abductions?
( it's disarming — concern from a stranger, like a shocking bolt out of the blue. even more disarming: the striking realization he's the first to even bother himself with asking after her, in the aftermath. )
I should be asking you that. Between the two of us, I think you've an attraction toward trouble.
( one might even call it magnetic. )
( it's disarming — concern from a stranger, like a shocking bolt out of the blue. even more disarming: the striking realization he's the first to even bother himself with asking after her, in the aftermath. )
I should be asking you that. Between the two of us, I think you've an attraction toward trouble.
( one might even call it magnetic. )
hey
( Excellent Start, Nami )
this is nami, we met awhile back. sorry to bug you, but have you seen nikolai?
we were supposed to meet up for mapping and i can't reach his phone. i know he's erratic, but he'd not usually this late.
( not that she's worried. that would mean she cares. she doesn't! just, you know. who's going to hold her bag if nikolai isn't around? )
( Excellent Start, Nami )
this is nami, we met awhile back. sorry to bug you, but have you seen nikolai?
we were supposed to meet up for mapping and i can't reach his phone. i know he's erratic, but he'd not usually this late.
( not that she's worried. that would mean she cares. she doesn't! just, you know. who's going to hold her bag if nikolai isn't around? )
( her eyes blur over the words once, twice. there's no quicksand-pit that opens in her stomach, slowly sinking her insides — she's known it, from the moment she woke without nikolai at the foot of her bed like a hyperactive puppy, waiting for her to acknowledge him on threat of finding him gnawing on her shoes for stimulation.
still, it's a good handful of minutes before alina responds at all, resentful that nami has forced her to address it at all. )
he's gone.
i tried to look for him, but
( but. but she knew it was pointless from the start, even if she'd walked through never-ending rooms until her feet turned sore and her sense of direction went dizzy. )
he's gone. i don't know where he went, or what they've done with him.
but he wouldn't have just left without me.
( surely that has to be true. somehow, deliberate over accidental abandonment seems (selfishly) worse to consider. )
still, it's a good handful of minutes before alina responds at all, resentful that nami has forced her to address it at all. )
he's gone.
i tried to look for him, but
( but. but she knew it was pointless from the start, even if she'd walked through never-ending rooms until her feet turned sore and her sense of direction went dizzy. )
he's gone. i don't know where he went, or what they've done with him.
but he wouldn't have just left without me.
( surely that has to be true. somehow, deliberate over accidental abandonment seems (selfishly) worse to consider. )
[ the text comes mid-afternoon, unprompted. ]
Might seem strange, but I noticed you weren't out by the lake today. Heard your name from a few of your friends who would come out to see you.
We've had an unspoken routine - thought I'd check in on you.
You're not missing much - there's a party happening near your spot. They're very, very drunk.
Might seem strange, but I noticed you weren't out by the lake today. Heard your name from a few of your friends who would come out to see you.
We've had an unspoken routine - thought I'd check in on you.
You're not missing much - there's a party happening near your spot. They're very, very drunk.
( the thing about alina starkov is — well. a lifetime of going unnoticed hasn't prepared her, exactly, for anyone noting her absence. it takes a moment to process it, along with the small warmth in her chest, when she rolls over to squint blearily at her phone. )
Oh. I may or may not be held captive by how comfortable these beds are.
It's a minor crisis. Sorry to have left you to the mercy of their daydrinking.
Have they fallen in the lake yet? You have to take a picture for me if they do.
Oh. I may or may not be held captive by how comfortable these beds are.
It's a minor crisis. Sorry to have left you to the mercy of their daydrinking.
Have they fallen in the lake yet? You have to take a picture for me if they do.
[ following her post on the network, ]
I fear I’m in much the same position as you, with little and less of what I know proving relevant within these walls.
Where did you learn your skills with herbs?
I fear I’m in much the same position as you, with little and less of what I know proving relevant within these walls.
Where did you learn your skills with herbs?
There seem to be more of us than I expected.
The other half of the time, I think the people used to places like this are speaking nonsense.
The woman who took me in as a child.
She was ( no warmth, all bite, her tough love like a harsh winter's embrace. ) strict in making sure I had the right tools to secure a future.
Not many girls escape a life in the sorts of places I was raised.
The other half of the time, I think the people used to places like this are speaking nonsense.
The woman who took me in as a child.
She was ( no warmth, all bite, her tough love like a harsh winter's embrace. ) strict in making sure I had the right tools to secure a future.
Not many girls escape a life in the sorts of places I was raised.
You were growing the herbs.
Do you have any for sleep?
Do you have any for sleep?
Matt has been teaching me.
( matt's little deceptive detour aside, much as she's learning to swallow that bitterness. )
If you want something for dreams, you're better off going to him. He's the expert.
But I know which ones can help you to sleep, if that's all you need.
( matt's little deceptive detour aside, much as she's learning to swallow that bitterness. )
If you want something for dreams, you're better off going to him. He's the expert.
But I know which ones can help you to sleep, if that's all you need.
( little bird. armand's preferred nickname for her, too. a communal joke, the paranoia inside of her wants to insist, between sharp-toothed vipers that think of her as small and breakable. she stares at the words on the screen for an inordinate amount of time, ice sludging her veins, chilling her blood — or what's left of it inside of her body, anyway.
hard to tell, past the wooziness in her head, the angry — doggedly alive — pulse of anger in her throat. she has to vent herself through a variety of responses (feeling peckish this morning? she writes firsts, deletes; i know one of your own killed parisa second), half-wishing she had real letters on a page to crumple, before she can think past it. before she can grit her teeth and force herself to play along. if paul and alia can't make the strategic moves on this chessboard, she will. )
I would say a warm bath and a fresh change of clothes would be nice, but not yet.
I want everyone to see what's been done to me. I want them to be reminded they failed.
I want them to know I won't rest until they're rooted out like the vermin they are.
( above all else, she wants them to be reminded of one glaring fact: i survived, and i'll be your ruination next. )
hard to tell, past the wooziness in her head, the angry — doggedly alive — pulse of anger in her throat. she has to vent herself through a variety of responses (feeling peckish this morning? she writes firsts, deletes; i know one of your own killed parisa second), half-wishing she had real letters on a page to crumple, before she can think past it. before she can grit her teeth and force herself to play along. if paul and alia can't make the strategic moves on this chessboard, she will. )
I would say a warm bath and a fresh change of clothes would be nice, but not yet.
I want everyone to see what's been done to me. I want them to be reminded they failed.
I want them to know I won't rest until they're rooted out like the vermin they are.
( above all else, she wants them to be reminded of one glaring fact: i survived, and i'll be your ruination next. )
I'm so glad you're alive.
It seems like pretty awful timing to offer this, but I wanted to let you know I finished your charm. And uh
that herbalism write-up I promised you ages ago.
[ A picture accompanies the text: a handwritten page of notes about the healing and magical properties of lavender, along with a sprig of dried lavender taped to the paper. ]
It seems like pretty awful timing to offer this, but I wanted to let you know I finished your charm. And uh
that herbalism write-up I promised you ages ago.
[ A picture accompanies the text: a handwritten page of notes about the healing and magical properties of lavender, along with a sprig of dried lavender taped to the paper. ]
Do you know anything of the one who harmed you?
It was a man. Tall, I think.
I couldn't see his face in the dark. He wore a mask, like the rest of us.
He caught me in the maze, and then he
( her empty stomach roils with the gory details of it, her guts threatening mutiny. indigestible to her, still, and having to hear paul repeat it to a pecking flock of onlookers — she feels far from her body, for a numb moment, disconnected from the horror of it. )
I don't know who he was. But I don't trust any of them.
I couldn't see his face in the dark. He wore a mask, like the rest of us.
He caught me in the maze, and then he
( her empty stomach roils with the gory details of it, her guts threatening mutiny. indigestible to her, still, and having to hear paul repeat it to a pecking flock of onlookers — she feels far from her body, for a numb moment, disconnected from the horror of it. )
I don't know who he was. But I don't trust any of them.
( the same question alina can't answer, spinning around inside her brain, a revolving door to an empty room. in the privacy of her room, she sighs, fatigue creeping into her consciousness now that she's exhausted her anger. )
I don't know.
A man. Strong. Tall.
I couldn't see his face. He wore a mask, like the rest of us.
It was red. Or pink. Maybe even orange. I didn't have
( she pauses, a necessary beat. )
There wasn't enough time to get a good look.
I don't know.
A man. Strong. Tall.
I couldn't see his face. He wore a mask, like the rest of us.
It was red. Or pink. Maybe even orange. I didn't have
( she pauses, a necessary beat. )
There wasn't enough time to get a good look.
Edited 2024-10-07 03:35 (UTC)
( shortly following overhearing this interaction. )
I know the one Louis speaks of. She's the second I vouch for.
I'm begging you, Alina, do not have her name dragged to the front. I will vouch for her. I will stake my honor and my reputation on it. If I'm wrong and she revealed a murderer in this game, I will out myself as having protected her for whatever punishment deemed fit. If I also independently find out she has done any of this, I will give her name up for the protection of others.
But she is new to vampirism. She needs care and guidance, not the eyes of the masses.
I asked her. I did ask. And I believe her when she answered me. Additionally, I know she has no knowledge of your unique abilities, but I also know she has no reason to fear them if she did know. ( even that's pushing so close to revealing who it is. he hates that the blond hair narrows it down so thinly. )
I know the one Louis speaks of. She's the second I vouch for.
I'm begging you, Alina, do not have her name dragged to the front. I will vouch for her. I will stake my honor and my reputation on it. If I'm wrong and she revealed a murderer in this game, I will out myself as having protected her for whatever punishment deemed fit. If I also independently find out she has done any of this, I will give her name up for the protection of others.
But she is new to vampirism. She needs care and guidance, not the eyes of the masses.
I asked her. I did ask. And I believe her when she answered me. Additionally, I know she has no knowledge of your unique abilities, but I also know she has no reason to fear them if she did know. ( even that's pushing so close to revealing who it is. he hates that the blond hair narrows it down so thinly. )
It wasn't my name to tell.
( — is all she'll say, on the matter. the ugly truth of it is that she has own suspicions of what alia's done, as glaringly as sunspots in her eyes. caroline would only be another sacrifice to put on the pyre to keep her name cleared, safe.
alina swallows the acid in her throat, threatening to empty what little is in her stomach. )
I'm not even sure I believed she did it.
It doesn't matter, now. Alicent would choose to believe everyone who whispers in her ear but me.
( — is all she'll say, on the matter. the ugly truth of it is that she has own suspicions of what alia's done, as glaringly as sunspots in her eyes. caroline would only be another sacrifice to put on the pyre to keep her name cleared, safe.
alina swallows the acid in her throat, threatening to empty what little is in her stomach. )
I'm not even sure I believed she did it.
It doesn't matter, now. Alicent would choose to believe everyone who whispers in her ear but me.
Alina, I must ask you something. If the votes remain as they are, do you want me to go willingly?
[It's against her nature to even ask, her honor as an Atreides, a Fedaykin, demanding she go down fighting. But it could endanger Alina, Paul, so she hesitates.]
[It's against her nature to even ask, her honor as an Atreides, a Fedaykin, demanding she go down fighting. But it could endanger Alina, Paul, so she hesitates.]
( the clear truth of it: no. paul would not want her to cower and slink into the dungeons like a monster forced back into the dark, away from civilization. alina wouldn't ask her for it, if she had her way. and still: )
Fighting them won't help. We've lost enough already, Alia.
Fighting them won't help. We've lost enough already, Alia.
Edited 2024-10-08 22:11 (UTC)
[ if any of alina’s accusations about her are true, it’s this: when she awoke to news of the dead, she thought first of rhaenyra (gone), then aemond (endangered, his loss potentially accelerated to that very morning), then alina (attacked). a moment that decided her priorities for each day that followed. the loss of others was not as important as those three — particularly the ones she may yet protect.
she certainly did not look closely at parisa’s death, when she hardly knew the girl, and had no lead to pursue, beyond the obvious (too obvious, she’d hoped, much like when they said jace willingly drowned, and tim named alia a suspect). ]
You believe Louis killed Parisa.
she certainly did not look closely at parisa’s death, when she hardly knew the girl, and had no lead to pursue, beyond the obvious (too obvious, she’d hoped, much like when they said jace willingly drowned, and tim named alia a suspect). ]
You believe Louis killed Parisa.
I do.
( she braces, of course, for the brunt of alicent's anger — the dismissal she had given the first, when alina had given her the ill omen. had tried to point her compass, subtlely, in another direction. )
I wasn't lying to you when I told you he gave me the name of another vampire too easily.
You didn't seem to know her. That only makes him look more suspicious.
The way Aemond spoke of the vampires, I assumed you were allies. Why hide her from you, but expose her to me?
( she braces, of course, for the brunt of alicent's anger — the dismissal she had given the first, when alina had given her the ill omen. had tried to point her compass, subtlely, in another direction. )
I wasn't lying to you when I told you he gave me the name of another vampire too easily.
You didn't seem to know her. That only makes him look more suspicious.
The way Aemond spoke of the vampires, I assumed you were allies. Why hide her from you, but expose her to me?
I did.
( much as alina's scabbed heart bleeds, still. much as it feels like alicent had taken the first knife to it. she nearly leaves it there, pride lodged in her throat, daring her to spit it out or choke on it. )
Alia is family. Not by blood, but by choice. I'll always protect her.
But your mother didn't deserve how weak she was made to look by me. I know it was an ugly thing to do.
I suppose I'd forgotten just how ugly it was, until everyone in that room tried to make me sound small and frail.
( much as alina's scabbed heart bleeds, still. much as it feels like alicent had taken the first knife to it. she nearly leaves it there, pride lodged in her throat, daring her to spit it out or choke on it. )
Alia is family. Not by blood, but by choice. I'll always protect her.
But your mother didn't deserve how weak she was made to look by me. I know it was an ugly thing to do.
I suppose I'd forgotten just how ugly it was, until everyone in that room tried to make me sound small and frail.
( she had expected armand, the way a dark sky warns of a storm at your door. what little of her insides aren't numbly anesthetized seize — not with shame, or remorse, but a premature sense of loss. an impeding knowledge of what parts of yourself you're meant to sever, like an amputated limb, to survive. )
Duty is often thankless, Armand.
( she could echo the question, she thinks. portia balfour will remember his accusation, from this day forward. parisa will remain dead, dead, dead. alia will be known as a monster, by all that see her.
instead, she just feels pathetically, humanly, tired. )
If you choose to hate me for trying to spare more lives and Louis the hurt of being used as a pawn in an ugly game, then hate me. I'll learn how to live with whatever contempt you believe I'm worthy of.
Duty is often thankless, Armand.
( she could echo the question, she thinks. portia balfour will remember his accusation, from this day forward. parisa will remain dead, dead, dead. alia will be known as a monster, by all that see her.
instead, she just feels pathetically, humanly, tired. )
If you choose to hate me for trying to spare more lives and Louis the hurt of being used as a pawn in an ugly game, then hate me. I'll learn how to live with whatever contempt you believe I'm worthy of.
Edited 2024-10-09 22:01 (UTC)
Some peace would be a nice change. Though I've a feeling we won't be seeing that for a long time.
It feels a little like home, for all the wrong reasons.
If Nikolai were here, he would say the constant threat on my life is a compliment to my strength or popularity.
Or something equally stupid.
( she misses him, and the safety net of that alliance, regardless. )
You're alright? In one piece, still?
It feels a little like home, for all the wrong reasons.
If Nikolai were here, he would say the constant threat on my life is a compliment to my strength or popularity.
Or something equally stupid.
( she misses him, and the safety net of that alliance, regardless. )
You're alright? In one piece, still?
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