( in case he's forgotten. it's self-punishing, the need to rush to remind him, before he can get one foot ahead in hating her. better to set herself up for it, and be prepared for the fallout. )
You could've woken up from your regular bouts of stupidity, and decided things were better for you without me.
I asked you to. Would it have been nice for you to trust me without the need for that? It certainly would have been easier. But you did need that. And I could handle it. And I invited it. I don't regret it.
I only hope you haven't lost trust in me since then.
I've never been a friend to anyone before. And I've never dealt with anything emotional before this place. I don't know that I could have done anything for you while you're suffering.
I just wouldn't have left you to feel alone in it, I guess. It is, unfortunately, the best I can offer. I'm utterly useless otherwise. I'm sure that doesn't surprise you, though.
( me. who can ever be expected to repair what is fundamentally broken? she swallows past the tightening knot in her throat. )
You stood by me in trying to find who did this to me. I haven't forgotten that. That's more than what most people did for me, even as they claimed to be my friend. You cared. You don't have to do more.
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I'm sorry I haven't been here for you.
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( in case he's forgotten. it's self-punishing, the need to rush to remind him, before he can get one foot ahead in hating her. better to set herself up for it, and be prepared for the fallout. )
You could've woken up from your regular bouts of stupidity, and decided things were better for you without me.
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I only hope you haven't lost trust in me since then.
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( sulkish. says woman who was rubbing salt into her own wound, masochistically, two seconds before this message arrived in lexi's phone. )
What could you have done since then? Sleep?
I'm more jealous than angry.
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I don't know, though, in all honesty.
I've never been a friend to anyone before. And I've never dealt with anything emotional before this place. I don't know that I could have done anything for you while you're suffering.
I just wouldn't have left you to feel alone in it, I guess. It is, unfortunately, the best I can offer.
I'm utterly useless otherwise. I'm sure that doesn't surprise you, though.
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( me. who can ever be expected to repair what is fundamentally broken? she swallows past the tightening knot in her throat. )
You stood by me in trying to find who did this to me.
I haven't forgotten that. That's more than what most people did for me, even as they claimed to be my friend.
You cared. You don't have to do more.