[Perhaps that's what Alia means -- Alina does not push, she does not insist upon an answer, does not pull the great and terrible and loathsome purpose from Alia's aching chest. The thought of it makes something shiver within her, the idea of showing such horror to someone who is becoming something, becoming important.
The only friends Alia has had were long-dead Reverend Mothers, were hardened Fedaykin who taught her to bleed life into the hungry sands of Arrakis, were her sad-eyed, soul-weary brother. The only care she had was for this last, Paul before anyone, Paul above the entire universe, a billion trillion lives sacrificed on the altar of the Kwisatch Haderach.
But the fact of it: she leaves pastries and sweets beneath Alina's bed. She imagines her sucking sugar from her fingers, smiling with cake crumbs on her cheek, bright eyes, soft lips, tangled curls. Alia imagines the sacrifices she would make, on this new altar building between her ribs.]
It seems to be a very mutually beneficial arrangement. I won't say too much, it's Paul's to tell, but you're very clever, Alina. And you have seen him, spoken to him. I think anyone could feel he's special. [Sibling bias, ingrained worship, loyalty that predates Alia's bones themselves, but she means it.]
That isn't a promise I've ever been made. But I [A pause, long, lingering.] I want that. I've wanted it for a long time.
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The only friends Alia has had were long-dead Reverend Mothers, were hardened Fedaykin who taught her to bleed life into the hungry sands of Arrakis, were her sad-eyed, soul-weary brother. The only care she had was for this last, Paul before anyone, Paul above the entire universe, a billion trillion lives sacrificed on the altar of the Kwisatch Haderach.
But the fact of it: she leaves pastries and sweets beneath Alina's bed. She imagines her sucking sugar from her fingers, smiling with cake crumbs on her cheek, bright eyes, soft lips, tangled curls. Alia imagines the sacrifices she would make, on this new altar building between her ribs.]
It seems to be a very mutually beneficial arrangement.
I won't say too much, it's Paul's to tell, but you're very clever, Alina. And you have seen him, spoken to him.
I think anyone could feel he's special. [Sibling bias, ingrained worship, loyalty that predates Alia's bones themselves, but she means it.]
That isn't a promise I've ever been made. But I [A pause, long, lingering.]
I want that.
I've wanted it for a long time.
Eat your cake before it gets stale.