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I have a ring. A witch spelled it so it protects me from the sun. And she didn't even want to! So it really definitely works.
[ she wouldn't tell alina if she didn't know the house lets her walk in the sun just the same as lestat and the others. (expect lexi, but maybe her ring will work for him. she hopes so.) ]
[ she wouldn't tell alina if she didn't know the house lets her walk in the sun just the same as lestat and the others. (expect lexi, but maybe her ring will work for him. she hopes so.) ]
And I allowed this place to take that dream from you.
( from the both of them, existing in their little cozy fantasy bubble — this game has taken a pin to it, deflating it with one echoing pop. alina scrubs a hand over her face, pinches between her eyebrows. for all that it's true, she feels spun in circles, following the cyclical nature of this conversation. alia forgives her. alina doesn't want forgiveness. neither of them were meant for compromise. and so the circle continues.
she pivots toward an issue with an easier solution, instead. )
They don't have to forgive you. They just have to accept what's done is done.
I've made a bargain with Queen Alicent. She's promised me your safety.
Whether you believe she means it is another question.
( from the both of them, existing in their little cozy fantasy bubble — this game has taken a pin to it, deflating it with one echoing pop. alina scrubs a hand over her face, pinches between her eyebrows. for all that it's true, she feels spun in circles, following the cyclical nature of this conversation. alia forgives her. alina doesn't want forgiveness. neither of them were meant for compromise. and so the circle continues.
she pivots toward an issue with an easier solution, instead. )
They don't have to forgive you. They just have to accept what's done is done.
I've made a bargain with Queen Alicent. She's promised me your safety.
Whether you believe she means it is another question.
I don't think your sparkle blood will hurt me if that's what you're worried about and if it does, I'll heal faster than you ever would.
Does Alia know your blood shimmers? She loves Twilight!
[ as if alina doesn't know this already. ]
Does Alia know your blood shimmers? She loves Twilight!
[ as if alina doesn't know this already. ]
I'm more worried I'll burn alive because of it, if I become what you are. But now that you mention it, thank you for bringing my attention to another fear.
( if nothing else, she's full of two things: the Horrors (tm) and The Fear (also tm). )
Please don't encourage her. You haven't seen half of the books she brings back from the library.
( if nothing else, she's full of two things: the Horrors (tm) and The Fear (also tm). )
Please don't encourage her. You haven't seen half of the books she brings back from the library.
( the thought is there, even if she doesn't share it: eddie's right that she's tired. that it's hollow guilt. everyone's sorry. no one wants to do anything about it, until it's them. in the quiet of her room, she blows out a heavy breath, trying to breathe past the crushing weight on her chest. )
You're offering me ... weeds?
I think most men offer flowers, at least.
( ???????? )
You're offering me ... weeds?
I think most men offer flowers, at least.
( ???????? )
[ this has never come up in mystic falls before. the vampirism burned away witch's powers and completely obliterated the doppelgänger blood in all the petrovas. presumably it would do the same to alina.
but. ]
but. ]
You can wear my ring for a few days!
Though hopefully we will never have to figure that out because I'm trying to keep you from dying not accelerate the process!
Though hopefully we will never have to figure that out because I'm trying to keep you from dying not accelerate the process!
I know it doesn't look like it right now, but I promise I don't make a habit of trying to die.
( contrary to what's probably popular belief, right now. )
Are there any other symptoms I should be worried about? Boils? Bad breath? Bloodlust? The sudden impulse to brood?
( contrary to what's probably popular belief, right now. )
Are there any other symptoms I should be worried about? Boils? Bad breath? Bloodlust? The sudden impulse to brood?
You do seem like you might be prone to brooding. So is my best friend.
As long as you don't die, your only symptoms of vampire healing will be perfect health.
As long as you don't die, your only symptoms of vampire healing will be perfect health.
Only sometimes. That's more Paul's territory. That's the one area boys are better in.
( #feminism. )
Let's hope the third time won't be the charm, in this case. I'll come to you when we're done being toyed with.
( and another thing: )
You can borrow some of Alia's books while we wait. If you read the same sort of thing.
( #feminism. )
Let's hope the third time won't be the charm, in this case. I'll come to you when we're done being toyed with.
( and another thing: )
You can borrow some of Alia's books while we wait. If you read the same sort of thing.
Thanks! I've been cooking my feelings so if you want anything to eat, I can trade for the books.
I don't remember disagreeing with you at that vote, nor am I responsible for the reactions of others. Would that I had the ability to control the rest of the mob. It would have been a far simpler game.
In any case, I would rather burn this house to the ground than work for its puppets.
In any case, I would rather burn this house to the ground than work for its puppets.
Funny how your memory works. I seem to have a distinct recollection of being threatened over it in private.
( she is, unsurprisingly, still soaked in the piss and vinegar of bitterness. a petty, childish hurt that lingers. )
You're hunting for allies, then?
( she is, unsurprisingly, still soaked in the piss and vinegar of bitterness. a petty, childish hurt that lingers. )
You're hunting for allies, then?
[ alicent abandons the scar to cup alina’s pulse in her neck, thumb soothing unmarred skin. her eyes flit over alina’s features, taking in every shift and pinch. if it becomes too great, she’ll draw away. the thought of losing alina — of both her and rhaneyra being taken —roils inside here. she’ll not forget how alina looked that first morning, bled and bruised to the edge of death. ]
A fair point. [ quiet and thoughtful, a conflicted look crossing her face. ] He is a recent arrival, unlikely to be allied with others.
[ she swallows hard, then. for the first time since she entered the room, her eyes drift from alina, fixing elsewhere. ]
There is another, of course. [ spoken from faraway, in the depths of her memory or the halls of her grief. ] Hawkins Fuller has kept the details of Embry's death to himself until this day. [ a hesitant look back. ] He believes Danny Johnson to be responsible, the same man Ash named. The circumstances of his death were — [ she falters, features crumpling at the thought of embry laid out in the chapel as alina was in the maze. ] Similar to your attack.
[ an almost pleading look in her eyes. do not make me speak the violence into reality again. ]
A fair point. [ quiet and thoughtful, a conflicted look crossing her face. ] He is a recent arrival, unlikely to be allied with others.
[ she swallows hard, then. for the first time since she entered the room, her eyes drift from alina, fixing elsewhere. ]
There is another, of course. [ spoken from faraway, in the depths of her memory or the halls of her grief. ] Hawkins Fuller has kept the details of Embry's death to himself until this day. [ a hesitant look back. ] He believes Danny Johnson to be responsible, the same man Ash named. The circumstances of his death were — [ she falters, features crumpling at the thought of embry laid out in the chapel as alina was in the maze. ] Similar to your attack.
[ an almost pleading look in her eyes. do not make me speak the violence into reality again. ]
[ you know he was going to let this go, but: ]
but you did hurt him. with the sun. maybe you don't know how much that scares me, the idea of doing that to him. or maybe you don't know what an idiot he is about his weaknesses. but you did it. are you saying you did it because you didn't want to?
i don't know who to trust now either.
but you did hurt him. with the sun. maybe you don't know how much that scares me, the idea of doing that to him. or maybe you don't know what an idiot he is about his weaknesses. but you did it. are you saying you did it because you didn't want to?
i don't know who to trust now either.
I'm saying I didn't want to be put in a position where I have to question someone I cared for. That I hated what I did, the moment it was done. That I wish I hadn't done it at all, but I did.
( some of us can control ourselves, she writes, sharpened to a cruel point. immediately backspaces, when the words on the screen knot her stomach into cramps. )
You want to punish me for it, clearly, so why don't you get it over with?
( some of us can control ourselves, she writes, sharpened to a cruel point. immediately backspaces, when the words on the screen knot her stomach into cramps. )
You want to punish me for it, clearly, so why don't you get it over with?
Then you would compel one from me.
[ is there dishonour in it? she is a queen, if not now then in a matter of reckoning, and queens and kings know that their words are law. aemond would understand most of all; he's done little else but prepare to stand in his brother's shadow and hope to be worthy of his light. ]
It remains unfulfilled, Alina. Even if you forgive it, the gods will know in true, and they will demand an answer in due course.
I am not asking you to name someone, but I would rather honour a promise made than be forgiven its debt.
Oaths needs be kept. Please.
[ is there dishonour in it? she is a queen, if not now then in a matter of reckoning, and queens and kings know that their words are law. aemond would understand most of all; he's done little else but prepare to stand in his brother's shadow and hope to be worthy of his light. ]
It remains unfulfilled, Alina. Even if you forgive it, the gods will know in true, and they will demand an answer in due course.
I am not asking you to name someone, but I would rather honour a promise made than be forgiven its debt.
Oaths needs be kept. Please.
( alina's imagination has always been an overactive thing. to her benefit, mostly, under ana kuya's strict watch — marching her pencil across the page, so that she might only ever imagine the brutality of the frontlines, a soldier more valuable for her maps than her trigger-finger. she can't say it's to her advantage, now, as it fills in every horrific, grotesque detail alicent can't bear to share, like the very taste of it in her throat might open it.
as alina's had. as embry's must have. her mind fills in the details of a blank canvas for her, in shades of gore and viscera — embry, shattered like a stained glass window. embry, bleeding into the basin of an altar. embry, made into a sacrilegious carving, at home in the vicious pages of the book of saints. her throat bobs, choking on nothing but air and frothy bile. scoffs through it, like the saliva clogging her mouth doesn't taste like sputtering up blood, the unforgettable stain of copper on her teeth, on her tongue, on the knife that kissed her that night. )
And I thought Nikolai held the title for most seasoned liar I've met.
( for days, the blood in her veins has coagulated into thick sludge. now, she can hear the rush of it in her ears, feel new rage revive the clamminess of her pulse. it kicks to life beneath the trap of alicent's thumb, thundering like a drum. it's hardly the first time a man has set her on fire to keep himself warm — revolting, still, is the reminder that this is all she'll ever be. the lamb you lead to the altar in offering to please an angry god. the sacrifice that needs to be made.
alina's mouth twists into an angry, snarled knot. for all that she tries to restrain it, her temper has always burned bright and incandescent. )
And he said nothing? ( her fingers blanch into fists, tight enough she can feel the bone creak. ) So it was my head under the executioner's axe, and not his?
as alina's had. as embry's must have. her mind fills in the details of a blank canvas for her, in shades of gore and viscera — embry, shattered like a stained glass window. embry, bleeding into the basin of an altar. embry, made into a sacrilegious carving, at home in the vicious pages of the book of saints. her throat bobs, choking on nothing but air and frothy bile. scoffs through it, like the saliva clogging her mouth doesn't taste like sputtering up blood, the unforgettable stain of copper on her teeth, on her tongue, on the knife that kissed her that night. )
And I thought Nikolai held the title for most seasoned liar I've met.
( for days, the blood in her veins has coagulated into thick sludge. now, she can hear the rush of it in her ears, feel new rage revive the clamminess of her pulse. it kicks to life beneath the trap of alicent's thumb, thundering like a drum. it's hardly the first time a man has set her on fire to keep himself warm — revolting, still, is the reminder that this is all she'll ever be. the lamb you lead to the altar in offering to please an angry god. the sacrifice that needs to be made.
alina's mouth twists into an angry, snarled knot. for all that she tries to restrain it, her temper has always burned bright and incandescent. )
And he said nothing? ( her fingers blanch into fists, tight enough she can feel the bone creak. ) So it was my head under the executioner's axe, and not his?
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